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attachment
November 2009 
Cooking and life
Posted on Apr 8th, 2009
by 
Ken
Ken
I saw the movie "How to Cook Your Life" about two weeks ago. It's an interesting and provocative movie. The main theme revolves around the concept of cooking as a manifestation of the inner state. For instance, I have been noticing that I tend to cook hastily and wastefully. I use more water than necessary to boil things and waste food in the process of draining and cutting. I like to cook quickly and spend as little time as possible in the kitchen.
But some of this changes when I know others will eat what I cook. I tend to take my time, ensuring taste and quality aren't sacrificed. I'm willing to expend additional effort in order to get a good product. And it's enjoyable to do this too!
So why can't I treat cooking for myself in the same emotional state as cooking for others? And this wasteful habit -- what is up with that?
In the two comments on the post, the first question has been addressed. It's time to take an attempt at answering the second question.
Maybe it's obvious, but the wasteful habit indicates an excess is always present. So why the excess? For me, it stems from a fear of not having enough. What if I run out? What if it is all gone? Expiration for me is a scary thing. Admitting it now is quite a revelation actually. I haven't thought about it like this until now. I feel uneasy sitting with the thought -- okay, maybe more than uneasy.
I remember when I was little that the idea of death was a scary thought. Loss is scary, especially when I am attached to something. Wait a minute -- I've talked about this a long time ago (it's mentioned in past posts on this blog). So this issue of attachment is resurfacing in a different manner.
I'm in awe.
But some of this changes when I know others will eat what I cook. I tend to take my time, ensuring taste and quality aren't sacrificed. I'm willing to expend additional effort in order to get a good product. And it's enjoyable to do this too!
So why can't I treat cooking for myself in the same emotional state as cooking for others? And this wasteful habit -- what is up with that?
In the two comments on the post, the first question has been addressed. It's time to take an attempt at answering the second question.
Maybe it's obvious, but the wasteful habit indicates an excess is always present. So why the excess? For me, it stems from a fear of not having enough. What if I run out? What if it is all gone? Expiration for me is a scary thing. Admitting it now is quite a revelation actually. I haven't thought about it like this until now. I feel uneasy sitting with the thought -- okay, maybe more than uneasy.
I remember when I was little that the idea of death was a scary thought. Loss is scary, especially when I am attached to something. Wait a minute -- I've talked about this a long time ago (it's mentioned in past posts on this blog). So this issue of attachment is resurfacing in a different manner.
I'm in awe.
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Ken! Oh, I loved this film; I saw it a good year or so ago but it's stuck with me ever since. And I relate so, so well to what you wrote about the difference between cooking for yourself and for others. I've been trying, recently, to put the same care and attention into my personal meals as I do those for others, but it's often hard. (And yes, I'm sure it betrays something about the worth I allot myself as opposed to others… :)
Thank you for the comment Siona! For a while there I thought I was alone in this. It is hard to place as much weight for personal meals as for others. Here's to more enjoyable personal cooking for both of us. :)